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I was more preoccupied with what I saw: worldliness, sophistication, a gateway to adulthood.None of these interactions became physical, which, looking back, was probably because I liked the idea rather than the reality. My interest in older men started to wane when one of my parents’ friends tried to grope me behind a door at a party. I look at my daughter now and I know what lies ahead.

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What I remember most about the girls I knew who dated older men was how confident they were among their friends, and how passive they were around their boyfriends. Different people have different preferences,” would suggest that attitudes are changing and that there is a sense that, when an older man pursues a much younger woman, something’s not quite right. Even so, I still hear male friends defending these partnerships, which always makes me wonder: what if it were your daughter? We still have a long way to go before grown men stop seeing teenage girls as ripe for the picking.Perhaps the difference is that now these things have been thought about, the repercussions have been felt and the language has been developed to unpick these relationships.Most importantly, the law is now frequently (but not always) being enforced.You need to start now to find someone special, or perhaps consider dating younger men.You also need to be prepared to think differently about what older men want from a dating relationship.

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